I watched this beautiful movie online this afternoon called Arth. This movie was released back in 1982 and is directed by Mahesh Bhatt. I dont know if this movie ever got aired on television before. Though, it was emotionally draining, I must admit, I am glad I saw a movie which is so well made and so much ahead of its times.
Anyways, the movie raises so many questions so relevant not just for me, but for today's world, the world full of insecurities, betrayals, break ups and instant gratifications. The biggest question of them all is life itself.
What is life? Why or how do you want to live it?
Can life be lead without anyone?
Is your life fulfilled if you get married, build a house and raise offsprings?
Can you ever live a life sans the society and people?
Is your life about finding that one thing that you are passionate about?
Is life about being ignorant and hence happy?
Is life about compromises?
Is life about finding one reason to live for?
I hope someone helps me find an answer for this question called life.
Sunday, March 09, 2008
Friday, January 04, 2008
Sleepless in "Shi"cago
Erghhhhh...It's past 3 AM here and I haven't had a single minute of sleep (ya I slept at 2AM agreed but I should have been asleep within 10-14 minutes, considering its already late). Goddamn! a few random thoughts are just bombarding my mind one after another.....thoughts about love, affection, life, sex, mistakes, past, future, unfulfilled needs, wants, passions, disappointments, friendships, relationships, failures, frustrations, desperations, society, helplessness and what not.
Staying at home all day long without any work is not what i chose to do. It has been enforced upon me. Believe me, staying on bench and not having to go to office is never a great idea when you want to escape life's hardships!!
Will try to get some sleep now that I have blogged it out...ufff...sigh!!
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Forgiveness
It is said that the greatest virtue of humankind is forgiveness..I am not so much worried about forgiveness for others...I am clueless about how to forgive myself from a very long time.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Questions remain....
He was in my dreams yesterday night. I did not remember the dream that well when I woke up but the first thing I recalled was that he was in my dreams. I dont know why he was. It seems there is an interpretation for every dream that you dream, but I cant interpret anything from the dream really....wait...is it that I still miss him?..................I dont know.
It was few months back when I met him last...we havent even exchanged emails for long now. Trying to be oblivious of each other's existence. When I met him though, it was like those suppressed emotions surging out of my system automatically without any control.
I wonder how it will be if and when I get to meet him. I am not even sure if we will ever cross paths again. This life is a long journey afterall, we might bump into each other some day some time in all probability. I guess then, it will be the same as ever. Somehow, the emotions dont seem to fade. Many have come and gone in my life, many things have happened in between, but noone was like him, nothing was like what it was. What was that? Why was that? How was that ?
For some questions in life, there are no answers.
It was few months back when I met him last...we havent even exchanged emails for long now. Trying to be oblivious of each other's existence. When I met him though, it was like those suppressed emotions surging out of my system automatically without any control.
I wonder how it will be if and when I get to meet him. I am not even sure if we will ever cross paths again. This life is a long journey afterall, we might bump into each other some day some time in all probability. I guess then, it will be the same as ever. Somehow, the emotions dont seem to fade. Many have come and gone in my life, many things have happened in between, but noone was like him, nothing was like what it was. What was that? Why was that? How was that ?
For some questions in life, there are no answers.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Why me?
Since past three days, one thought plagued me throughout. "Why me?". Why am I going through so much in life? Why did I never get what I wanted? Why was I unlucky? blah blah blah...
I did not
- rob/kill anyone
- waste my dad's money to party and have fun
- go out to pubs/discs
- trouble anyone out of jealousy
- did not backstab anyone
Yet, at the end of it, people who did all these are happy and content in life and I am not.
My perspective changed in office today when I went to get some water from the water fountain. I saw a person with cerebral palsy having to use his motor cart to move around and needed constant help from his guardian. Instantly, I felt lighter. Suddenly, I was thankful for what I have.
I have
- good health
- fair amount of intelligence to gain a livelyhood
- independent enough to cook my food, drive my car and do my chores
- enough love and affection from people I care
- mental strength to deal with life's ups and downs
Now, at this moment, I have no complaints.
I did not
- rob/kill anyone
- waste my dad's money to party and have fun
- go out to pubs/discs
- trouble anyone out of jealousy
- did not backstab anyone
Yet, at the end of it, people who did all these are happy and content in life and I am not.
My perspective changed in office today when I went to get some water from the water fountain. I saw a person with cerebral palsy having to use his motor cart to move around and needed constant help from his guardian. Instantly, I felt lighter. Suddenly, I was thankful for what I have.
I have
- good health
- fair amount of intelligence to gain a livelyhood
- independent enough to cook my food, drive my car and do my chores
- enough love and affection from people I care
- mental strength to deal with life's ups and downs
Now, at this moment, I have no complaints.
Friday, December 07, 2007
Stereotypical
Even today, lot of men (let me be specific, this applies mostly to Indian men) marry women with the following "taken for granted" assumptions:-
- My wife will cook delicious lunch/dinner for me while I watch my favorite movie on TV sleeping on the couch.
- My wife will be a kshmayadaritri (The Forgiving Earth). She will be patient, she will endure all the pain, she will forgive my impatience, my foolishness..she will accept my follies, pray for my good and support me with whatever I want to do in life
- My wife will keep my parents happy. She will be an obedient daughter-in-law and listen to whatever my parents have to say. She will cook with my mother, help her with the chores, makes coffee for my dad and serves me bed coffee every morning.
- My wife will dress up like a doll on festivals, will socialize with my friends and will attend parties with me.
- My wife will be a close friend of my sister/brother. She treats them like her own siblings.
- My wife depends on me to take her to office, manage her bills, manage her finances.
Even as they are happily busy imagining their future with their stereotypical wives, they completely ignore the following facts:-
- Your wife also works as hard as you at office and comes back at around the same time. She definitely needs a helping hand in kitchen
- Just like how you expect her to be patient, you should also be patient, forgiving and accept as she is.
- She also has parents. It does not work anymore that you are only ready to accept her as part of the family and not her own parents.
- She also has her set of friends, parties, social events that you have to be a part of.
- She also has siblings just like you do.
- She is an independent woman with a career of her own and can manage her life pretty well with or without you. All she needs is moral support.
I am not generalizing all the men in the above category. It only hurts that some men are still conservative as much as their fathers and fore fathers.
- My wife will cook delicious lunch/dinner for me while I watch my favorite movie on TV sleeping on the couch.
- My wife will be a kshmayadaritri (The Forgiving Earth). She will be patient, she will endure all the pain, she will forgive my impatience, my foolishness..she will accept my follies, pray for my good and support me with whatever I want to do in life
- My wife will keep my parents happy. She will be an obedient daughter-in-law and listen to whatever my parents have to say. She will cook with my mother, help her with the chores, makes coffee for my dad and serves me bed coffee every morning.
- My wife will dress up like a doll on festivals, will socialize with my friends and will attend parties with me.
- My wife will be a close friend of my sister/brother. She treats them like her own siblings.
- My wife depends on me to take her to office, manage her bills, manage her finances.
Even as they are happily busy imagining their future with their stereotypical wives, they completely ignore the following facts:-
- Your wife also works as hard as you at office and comes back at around the same time. She definitely needs a helping hand in kitchen
- Just like how you expect her to be patient, you should also be patient, forgiving and accept as she is.
- She also has parents. It does not work anymore that you are only ready to accept her as part of the family and not her own parents.
- She also has her set of friends, parties, social events that you have to be a part of.
- She also has siblings just like you do.
- She is an independent woman with a career of her own and can manage her life pretty well with or without you. All she needs is moral support.
I am not generalizing all the men in the above category. It only hurts that some men are still conservative as much as their fathers and fore fathers.
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Alter Ego
M called over the weekend to announce that she is finally finally seeing someone. (M was my classmate in college and a good friend). It seems the guy is someone whom she met through her parents. (I am quite surprised that M is going for an arranged marriage.)
M is attractive because of her intelligence and sensitivity more than her physical features (of course she is quite good looking too). She acts like this always elusive, enigmatic lady that makes people curious about her. M had a huge fan(read guys) following in college and apparently, the fan club only grew with time( got to know from a very reliable source and that is M herself :P).
I wonder why M could not pick one of her fans as her life partner. May be, it was her family. May be that the guy she liked was committed to someone else. May be, it was that she did not feel that any of the guys was worth considering. May be, it was the problem of plenty.
Replace M with I and it is the same story, well almost.
M is attractive because of her intelligence and sensitivity more than her physical features (of course she is quite good looking too). She acts like this always elusive, enigmatic lady that makes people curious about her. M had a huge fan(read guys) following in college and apparently, the fan club only grew with time( got to know from a very reliable source and that is M herself :P).
I wonder why M could not pick one of her fans as her life partner. May be, it was her family. May be that the guy she liked was committed to someone else. May be, it was that she did not feel that any of the guys was worth considering. May be, it was the problem of plenty.
Replace M with I and it is the same story, well almost.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)